Can someone give me some words of advice?

I am feeling very depressed at the moment, i have no confidence at all. I work through the week and come home, have tea then go to bed and at the weekends i spend my time cleaning the house or on yahoo! I have friends but i haven't seen them in a year as i always make excuses not to go out.





I had low confidence to start with but now i have gained weight and i feel worse. I would love to lose weight and have more confidence but i don't know how to do this, i always end up failing as i have no motivation. I keep thinking life is short and you should make the most of it and i think is i were to die right now i have done nothing with my life.





I don't want to see a doctor as they will just give me anti depressants which will mask the problem as i have been on them before but as soon as i came off the problems came back. Can anyone you give me any advice, please be nice as i am feeling very emotional at the moment!Can someone give me some words of advice?
My friend, you sound a very sensible person, you have realised that medication is not the 100% answer to how you feel at the moment. Don't lose contact with your friends....are they the type of friends you could invite to your house for coffee, tea or a glass of wine, why not try ? With the weight increase, how about beginning with going for a brisk walk everyday building up the mileage gradually also try and move yourself onto a healthy eating regime, not necessarily anything like ';Weightwatchers..your motivation could be to get into a smaller dress size and when achieved you will feel very positive plus gaining confidence.


You are quite right, we are on this earth only once not on a trial run...make the most of every minute so come on, my friend, make a start today.....Good Luck.Can someone give me some words of advice?
First right now, before you do anything else take a deep breath, but breath in through your nose and out through your mouth, breath like that for a few minutes. Then if work is close enough walk to work during the week, eat more fruits, say hello to your neighbors when you see them. if something is troubling you go to your closest friend and tell them that will help a lot, if you have faith and praying is something you are not against try praying; spill it all out to God, it can help you a lot to do that, also if you don't have any pets try getting a cat.
Hi there





Try this link to the Mind website -





Understanding depression:


http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Bookl鈥?/a>





the information is easy to read and understand.





I can understand your reluctance to go back on medication, but it really would be a good idea to go and see your GP to discuss how you are feeling.





Making sense of antidepressants:


http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Bookl鈥?/a>





gives good advice on medication and what to expect from it. The idea is that it helps to alleviate some of the symptoms so that you can address the underlying problems and work on them.





There are alternatives to medication, and it may be that your GP would refer you for some kind of talking treatment. The only problem with that is the length of time a referral can take.





Also remember that just because your GP suggests medication, you have the right to decline it if you don't feel happy taking it. You also have the right to ask questions and get answers about any side effects or problems that may occur. GP's are there to help and advise and we all need to remember that we have a right to question them if we need to.





My other suggestion would be to contact your local mental health charity:





http://www.mind.org.uk/Mind+in+your+area鈥?/a>





they are much less formal than the health services, but have lots of knowledge and understanding, they work with people who suffer from mental ill health and do so on a daily basis.





They can offer support, help and guidance on a wide range of things. They are easy to access and you don't have to be referred by anyone else, it only takes a phone call.





Hope this helps.
be good to yourself. Treat yourself to something nice. Is there anything you wish you had done? wish you had said? want to go and see? want to go and do? then go and do it. Make a small goal and plan how to get there with small steps.
well a word of advise would be to go gym or work out at home. I'm not saying this because you said you've gained weight but burning out and letting your sweat come is like letting out the combussion inside your body, then take a hot bath, watch tele or read magazine. don't think that fun is out side your door step. u can enjoy urself while staying indoors too. I do it on most my weekends;)....hope it helps
Two words for you my friend...Tony Robins....


Search : AWaken the giant within by Tony Robins.


He has helped millions..... he will help you too.


Also...Wise words from my grandfather......


'; You only got ONE life not Two....


Only YOU can make it happen for you.';


Good luck..............live your dreams..NOW!!
Your thinking is very clear... you are absolutely right not to want to take anti-depressants.





Yoga and or Meditation will correct the depression and the self confidence issue. It may take a little time but IT DOES WORK... and you can feel confident that you are doing it right. Most people don't realize that yoga and meditation also bring weight normalization. It works there too.





Google ';Yoga Finder'; for personal instruction... and if you want immidiate help, go to the 3 research sections at New Free Books. There are a number of things there that would be useful to you... just take a few minutes and brouse around there. Good info...





Have a fulfulling future, and this advice will give it to you... I promise. It will change you from the inside-out.
Everyone goes through states like this once or twice in life, you are normal and will be fine very soon, you gained the weight that is because of your poor social life, all the time you are resting and not going out or doing something.
shun advice by any price that's what called good advice (B.Hain from Danish)
Get some exercise. It will give you more energy, you'll feel better, and you'll lose weight. If all you do to start is go for a walk, then you have started. Do something every day and work your way up to more intensive stuff. You'll feel better.
word of advice, don't eat yellow snow.
go to a therapist. i've heard they can do a lot for people. they find out why the problem is happening and try helping you..





best of luck,, hope you feel better.
Sounds like you came off anti depressants too soon, they are not addictive and they do help a great deal! Do you have someone to talk to? friends, hubby.....Get out in the fresh air for a walk, good for depression and the figure. Talk to your doctor, they WILL help you. Do you have children?


Get some help, life IS wonderful............and remember the best things in life are free! hope you have a happy, healthy future. x
ask the doctor to refer you for counselling, refuse the anti depressants as you know they do not solve your underlying problems.





the counselling helps but only you can change your state of mind which at the moment is very negative. if you cant help yourself, do something to make someone else feel better, go and visit your friends, it will make them happy that you made an effort to see them, deeds like this will slowly help you realise your own self worth.





think about it.
You're wrong about one thing - antidepressants won't ';mask'; the problem. They'll fix the chemical imbalance in your brain and give you energy and positivity to do the things you want to do. Generally they just eradicate the ';downers';. Try them. I insist. They work miracles.
SAY YES MORE!
hi , i am bow wow and i think is sad that you i die but you still have more life just don think that you die very soon just go for a walk or like shopping's and like go to a park for walk if you still feeling sad just messages me . my phone is 91941358 . wish you a happy new year
';I don't want to see a doctor as they will just give me anti depressants which will mask the problem ...';





I'm glad you said this, so I can educate you.





Do you know what depression is? Do you know what antidepressants actually do?





Depression revolves mainly around a neurotransmitter(chemicals in your brain) called serotonin. When the nerve synapses don't have enough of them, and reuptake them too much, this will affect mood.





Antidepressives are broadly known as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRI's). When you take them, they allow the serotonin to stay in the synapse longer, as they normally should.





Speaking as someone who has personally dealt with depression (your question is like something I would've said six years ago), you are CLASSIC for describing it.





Losing the weight ultimately does not deal with depression. Your weight gain is probably the side effect of the depression that you already have. So don't look to that as ';the cure.';





Antidepressives are given on a 90 day trial (it does take a few weeks to a month to get therapeutic ranges in there) quite often. Please don't set yourself up to find reasons why NOT to get treatment. Your condition is treatable! Maybe a few therapy sessions will have you thinking about what's eating you. The do not ';mask'; the problem. They do what your body should be doing on it's own. It's like calcium tablets do not ';mask'; osteoperosis. Osteoperosis is TREATED, because it is a disease.





From experience, this is what I did- I got so fed up with the way things were. I enrolled in a class at the community college. I wanted to do something with my life as I felt mine had little value or productivity to me or the community. I signed up to go to school. I decided to be a nurse, come hell or high water, even if it killed me, because anything had to be better than what I was living. I had a job as a cashier at Home Depot, and I felt I was going nowhere. So I enrolled in school. I got more activity by having to get out of the house. Pretty soon, another quarter would come up and I'd feel ';good'; about going to school...maybe even a little smarter?? I was getting good grades. I felt proud of my small little accomplishments. My self confidence went up, I started feeling like I deserved a better life,... that I was valuable.





So, here I am today. I started the last semester of school. I am graduating and getting my RN degree. I started with baby steps, but I can honestly say, the journey has changed my life for the better.





Start with getting some activity outside. Even a little bit. That will also help with depression, believe it or not.





You may be up for a career change. You may also need to acknowledge the condition you have. It will not go away. So treat it. And if your doctor isn't giving you what you need, then go to a different doc. You deserve more.
After reading through this mssg. it appears to me that what would cheer you up no end is:) you seem quite desperate for some'companionship', there's many people in your situation but if you don't make the EFFORT to do something about it then you'll just stagnate %26amp; get STUCK in a rut!....Good luck bud!....
you may have came off the medication too early,


go see your GP again.


dont give up.
Firstly, don't lose your friends, talk to them and explain how you are feeling. Never under estimate the power of your friends, they are very important people in your life. Go for walks, it's great for exercise and will help break the cycle of being indoors and doing nothing.