Let me give you a little bit of background information on my situation.
I have a very close family friend named Brad who is practically a second dad to me. Almost 2 years ago, he was diagnosed with a rare form of bone cancer called chondrosarcoma. He has had 3 massive surgeries in a 4 month span, 2 1/2 months of stomach bedrest and hundreds of hours of physical therapy. He has also gone to Germany(we live in the U.S.) 3 times in order to get experimental treatments because there is very little information on this type of cancer. This man has lived WAY past what the doctors said that he would and our entire family/church family is very grateful for that. We have had several benefits for him and our entire church is praying for a miracle. Resently, one of his lungs is 100% tumor and the other is 67% tumor, making breathing extremely difficult. He is having a very difficult day today and some people aren't expecting him to make it through the night. I am supposed to go see him tomorrow and I'm very very scared on what tonight and tomorrow might hold. I know it is even worse because my dad is having second thoughts on letting me go see Brad tomorrow. Brad is one of the most religious, kindhearted, giving, and god following men I know. He has an amazingly strong wife and two beautiful children. A girl who is 2 and a boy who turned 5 today. We are all very close and all struggling together.
I have been raised in a church my entire life and I know that god has a plan for everyone even though we cant always understand it, but i can not express how badly i want to know why god is letting all of this happen. Brad has had god first in his life, so why is god hurting him so much? Im begging god to heal Brad. His wife, children, and family all need him desperatly. There arent any other treatments avalible for Brad because he is too weak. This situation is all in god's hands.
If you have any words of advice, confort, scripture, ect. please tell me. As I am typing this tears are running down my face. I dont think im going to be able to sleep tonight considering the circumstances.
Thank You in advance and God Bless
34 minutes ago - 3 days left to answer.
Additional Details
EXTRA DETAILS
If I may clarify on a small part- In no way shape or form am I blaming the all powerful God that saved all of us.I am simply confused and shocked that he is allowing this cancer to slowly kill Brad. I called Brad a week ago and he made it clear that if its god's will for him to go to heaven, he will do so. He is worried about his family and what will happen to them. Brads brother died several years ago so his family has already been through alot.
Thank you for all the answers so far and please keep them coming
I am 14 and I understand my dad's worries but I would much rather tell him everything i want to and be heartbroken then regret my entire life on not telling Brad how i feel towards him and to give him a huge hug.Do you have any words of advice, words of reassurance or scripture that can help me?
Personally I believe that Brad has become very sick like this because is a godly man who has a lot of faith. The devil doesn't really fight against people who are ';of the world';. The are already his slaves, for before we know the Lord we are slaves to sin. The enemy really wants to hurt him because he is such a powerful Christian. I also believe that God wants to use this attack to be glorified by healing Brad miraculously and causing him to prosper. (Job.)
And NOW is the time the Lord desires to make him miraculously whole, not just after he passes away. For in Isaiah 53:4,5 we are told, ';Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But He was wounded for our transgressions, bruised for our iniquities, the chastisement of our peace was upon Him, and with His stripes we are healed.'; Of course just by merely reading that verse, and even the whole chapter, it wouldn't sound as though that has anything to do with physical healing, just spiritual healing. But the Hebrew word for ';healed'; here means ';to heal thoroughly; make whole';, ';griefs'; can mean ';sickness'; and ';sorrows'; can mean ';pain';. Then in Matthew 8:16, 17 we are told this: Mat 8:16 And evening having come on, they brought to Him many having been possessed by demons. And He cast out the spirits by a word, and He healed all those having illness, so that it might be fulfilled that spoken through Isaiah the prophet, saying, ';He took upon Himself our weaknesses, and bore our sicknesses.'; Also when Jesus told us, in John 3:17, that He came so we could be saved, the word ';saved'; means ';to heal; make whole';.
And remember, not matter what the ';nay-sayers'; try and tell you, miracles STILL DO HAPPEN! If any Christian denies that they need to read Hebrews 13:8 and see what God says. ';Jesus Christ is the SAME, yesterday, today, and FOREVER.'; (Emphasis added.)
I'll be praying for Brad as well as you.
Take care, and God bless you.Do you have any words of advice, words of reassurance or scripture that can help me?
Like you said it is in Gods hands.I find it very comforting to know I am not expected to handle things like this.You are very young and will in time face other situations like this.Let your friends courage and faith be his testimony to you.
revelation 21:3-4
II corinthians 1:3-4
http://www.gotquestions.org/questions_Go鈥?/a>
try an alternative cancer treatment.. not fda approved.
http://www.miraclemineral.org/
God is not hurting your friend. you've answered your question yourself...sometimes we'll never understand why we go through things.
Be strong. You've been very brave so far. I'm sure Brad wouldn't want you to worry yourself too much for his sake.
I'll pray 4 u and him.
Following God does not make you immune to trials. In fact I would say that it is the opposite you become more prone to have trials come into your life. The real blessings that come from following God is being able to endure through those trials.
We need our trails they provide us an opportunity to grow that we would not have otherwise.
Look at this from God's perspective. Thanks to the sacrifice of His son Jesus Christ every single person who has ever or will ever be born, including those children who died before they were able to be born, will be resurrected. Their body and spirit will be reunited never again to be separated. They will also be restored to their perfect frame. Their bodies will be free from any handicaps, or similar thing, they suffered with in this life.
Brad, no matter what happens to him during his ordeal with this terrible cancer will be made whole again and when the time comes that his spirit and body part he will go to that God that he has so faithfully served, and will greet you upon your entry into the next life with the warmest of greetings, because of the love and friendship that you have for him.
When you do talk to Brad next ask him how he stays as strong as he does and also as God to help you learn that as well.
My prayers go out to you my young friend.
golly sweetie, you've asked this before. didn't you like the answers you got on it the last time? i thought they were great answers!
bless you!
delme
Just remember to have faith. Jesus performed miracles on people because they believe in Him. Also, remember that God only gives us as much we can handle and no more. As for advice, all I can tell you is that is to read some of the Bible, you could just turn to any random page and start reading. I always find comfort in reading the Bible. I will also make sure to pray for you and your family right before I go to sleep.
Sorry for you, your family, brad, and his family. When my mother died from a very painful, dibilitating bout of cancer, Christians told me that 'she is in a better place' that 'god needed her more than we did' and that 'god loved her so much that he wanted her there with him'.
None of that was very helpful. As a 15 year old, I couldn't understand why god would think that he needed my mother more than me and my little sister did.
Regardless, god didn't help and god didn't show.
Nor did 'he' make my mom's pain go away.
Brad is important to you and you should be there for him and his family tomorrow. but don't forget that, following Brad's life, his family will need support then as well. All too often, the support stops on the day or week of the funeral . These children will forever be without their daddy....and you sound like a great girl who cares about this family. You should support them and Brad in whatever way you can.
%26lt;atheist; aid worker
Brad is going to die, and you should be there to witness his going. It's an event that you will regret later if you miss it. I was there when both my grandmothers and my father died, and I was there when a dear friend died of Aids. Don't miss it.
I don't know why God is taking Brad, but God is not the cause of Brad's pain, He is the comfort that relieves the pain. It is a sad fact that most cancer's are a result of modern day living and the gene pool becoming thin. God is not the cause, we are.
Do not mourn his passing, for he's going to to be with God. You will mourn the loss of him in your life, but for him there is nothing but goodness to come. Go and celebrate his life and witness his death. It is the most loving thing we can do.
Look at the big picture.
Here are some simple facts. You and I are not promised tomorrow or even toady. Facts are that we do not even know if you will finish reading this before you or I are called home. With that in mind I would like to point out that Heaven will be a whole lot better place then lying in the hospital fighting a body all ate up with cancer. If Brad goes home tonight then Brad is home. The only problem is that we will miss him while we wait to go home too.
At the same time your distress shows what a wonderful and warm heart you have,
May the Lord richly bless you and grant you wisdom and comfort in this time of trouble.
Your Dad is trying to protect you...the last hours of a person's life are not often pleasant to witness. That said, I say you should be allowed to go. When my Grandfather passed on from bone cancer, he was surrounded by our entire family, we quietly held our last respects and he went knowing everyone loved him. He was also heavily medicated so there was no screaming or shouting (and people dying do this sometimes, so be mindful of that) and he passed very peacefully. With one breath he was with us, with the next he was gone. It was one of the saddest and most moving things I ever experienced. My girls who are closer to your age only chose to come in and visit for a few minutes hours before the end...this would probably be the best thing for you to do. Everyone needs the chance to say goodbye to loved ones. You'll be in my thoughts.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Bartending?Words of advice...?
I just got TABC certified today and will start searching bars for employment. I dont drink but I dont care when other people drink. My parents are a little upset that I'm doing this, but I'm really only doing it for the money because my husband and I need it. What should I say to my parents to let them know I'll be okay? Also, what are some things I should expect while bartending? How should I dress when looking for a job at a bar? Thanks in advance for all your answers!Bartending?Words of advice...?
i would suggest bartending at a restaurant that has a bar, rather than an actual bar. you will still be able to make great money, and your bar guests will be expected to keep it friendly. less fights, and such to deal with. and your parents will prob be more understanding of a restaurant bar. i notice you said tabc, so you are from texas, will you be in a dry county? if so you will have to deal with unicards, or some other type of membership, which is a hassel. as a bartender, expect to hear everything but act like you heard nothing. people have the most bizarre conversations in public. you will have to deal with some tough customers, but you will also have regulars who you will love, and they will help you out if theres a bar fight, because regulars tend to try to protect their bartender and their bar. hope i helped!Bartending?Words of advice...?
Hey Kid! Congratulations with the TABC, Cert. Parents are going to be parents about these kind of things, no matter where you live, unless they are barflies themselves.
I would try for the ';O'; club on base. It's a lot classier than the Non-Com club on base. Of course the advantage to both is you don't have to leave the base, if you have on-base housing. Officers in general, are more likely to behave (accept for the pilots, who tend to be jerks no matter what branch they serve in) and will impress your parents. It might even help your husbands career. Dress is conservative, so wear a womans suit to the interview.
I would dress in a casual dress attire. Unless you are job searching in very upscale places then dress in casual business attire. I was a bartender part time to earn extra income and I was fine. I would suggest looking for a restaurant/bars so you are not alone in a bar at night. Plus bars in restaurants usually close with in an hour of dining room so you will not be out until 4:00am.
depends on the place you work for, if its upscale more than likely it will be laid back atmosphere full of the rich and broke pretending to be well off, if its a place where a lot of college kids drink expect it to crazy as hell some nights, like fights, someone passes out, screaming, yelling, guys hitting on you, well you should expect that from any bar you work at. since you've never worked as a bartender, get ready to see a whole different world of people come your way...good luck
you have to show them you are confident and know your drinks. lie even to them to get the job even if your not so sure bout something they require.cuz even if you dont know you will have to.they dont tell you tips.so you have to watch
and pick up fast.
the good side is you can relax n talk with new people.free drinks and tips too :D
o. ok. i just started bartending a few months ago... its fun. flirt alot. be social (u get more and bigger tips that way). dress cute for attention, but not slutty... and dress appropriate for your age. thats how i do it.
It depends on the type of bar it is. If it gets busy - be prepared to work your butt off. Going to a bartending school is nothing like 'real life' behind the bar. When you are in class nobody is drinking, fighting, hitting on you etc. Bartending isn't just looking cute and pouring a drink - it's never like is was in ';Coyote Ugly';. You have to lug cases of alchohol, beer, buckets of ice and sometimes kegs and be prepared to be met with a lot of thirsty people all at the same time.
Someones suggestions of working in a 'behind the scenes' restaurant bar is a good suggestion, but if you aren't in a place with a lot of big, busy restaurants, most place don't just have a bar for dinner patrons only - or the bar staff swaps nights working in the regular bar for the back bar.
I have worked some really rough joints and classy places and one thing remains the same. A mean drunk is a mean drunk no matter their walk in life. Be prepared to meet a few and if your lucky - really lucky - you will have a bouncer.
Wearing a short skirt helps with the tips.
I don't have any advice on what to tell your parents. I got into bartending because I liked to drink and the camaraderie. I needed to leave for the same reasons. Too much drinking and too much camaraderie.
My gut tells me you won't last long in this industry - sorry. You need to also gel with the customers and be a good listener. If you are only doing it for the money your boss and your customers will know it.
i would suggest bartending at a restaurant that has a bar, rather than an actual bar. you will still be able to make great money, and your bar guests will be expected to keep it friendly. less fights, and such to deal with. and your parents will prob be more understanding of a restaurant bar. i notice you said tabc, so you are from texas, will you be in a dry county? if so you will have to deal with unicards, or some other type of membership, which is a hassel. as a bartender, expect to hear everything but act like you heard nothing. people have the most bizarre conversations in public. you will have to deal with some tough customers, but you will also have regulars who you will love, and they will help you out if theres a bar fight, because regulars tend to try to protect their bartender and their bar. hope i helped!Bartending?Words of advice...?
Hey Kid! Congratulations with the TABC, Cert. Parents are going to be parents about these kind of things, no matter where you live, unless they are barflies themselves.
I would try for the ';O'; club on base. It's a lot classier than the Non-Com club on base. Of course the advantage to both is you don't have to leave the base, if you have on-base housing. Officers in general, are more likely to behave (accept for the pilots, who tend to be jerks no matter what branch they serve in) and will impress your parents. It might even help your husbands career. Dress is conservative, so wear a womans suit to the interview.
I would dress in a casual dress attire. Unless you are job searching in very upscale places then dress in casual business attire. I was a bartender part time to earn extra income and I was fine. I would suggest looking for a restaurant/bars so you are not alone in a bar at night. Plus bars in restaurants usually close with in an hour of dining room so you will not be out until 4:00am.
depends on the place you work for, if its upscale more than likely it will be laid back atmosphere full of the rich and broke pretending to be well off, if its a place where a lot of college kids drink expect it to crazy as hell some nights, like fights, someone passes out, screaming, yelling, guys hitting on you, well you should expect that from any bar you work at. since you've never worked as a bartender, get ready to see a whole different world of people come your way...good luck
you have to show them you are confident and know your drinks. lie even to them to get the job even if your not so sure bout something they require.cuz even if you dont know you will have to.they dont tell you tips.so you have to watch
and pick up fast.
the good side is you can relax n talk with new people.free drinks and tips too :D
o. ok. i just started bartending a few months ago... its fun. flirt alot. be social (u get more and bigger tips that way). dress cute for attention, but not slutty... and dress appropriate for your age. thats how i do it.
It depends on the type of bar it is. If it gets busy - be prepared to work your butt off. Going to a bartending school is nothing like 'real life' behind the bar. When you are in class nobody is drinking, fighting, hitting on you etc. Bartending isn't just looking cute and pouring a drink - it's never like is was in ';Coyote Ugly';. You have to lug cases of alchohol, beer, buckets of ice and sometimes kegs and be prepared to be met with a lot of thirsty people all at the same time.
Someones suggestions of working in a 'behind the scenes' restaurant bar is a good suggestion, but if you aren't in a place with a lot of big, busy restaurants, most place don't just have a bar for dinner patrons only - or the bar staff swaps nights working in the regular bar for the back bar.
I have worked some really rough joints and classy places and one thing remains the same. A mean drunk is a mean drunk no matter their walk in life. Be prepared to meet a few and if your lucky - really lucky - you will have a bouncer.
Wearing a short skirt helps with the tips.
I don't have any advice on what to tell your parents. I got into bartending because I liked to drink and the camaraderie. I needed to leave for the same reasons. Too much drinking and too much camaraderie.
My gut tells me you won't last long in this industry - sorry. You need to also gel with the customers and be a good listener. If you are only doing it for the money your boss and your customers will know it.
So excited! Finally TTC #1! Any hints or words of advice?
We're joining all you TTC'ers on the TTC journey! I'm really excited and just looking for any hints or advice you may have about things that have worked for you during TTC. Thanks and baby dust to everyone!So excited! Finally TTC #1! Any hints or words of advice?
im TTC #1 also!!!!! but defently keep a healty diet and make sure you dont stress about it!!! just stay calm and dont think about it happeneing and you and your hubby have lots of fun!!! :) **lots of baby dust to you**So excited! Finally TTC #1! Any hints or words of advice?
Since I'm also ttc #1 but for 2+ years now....My advice is that if you want to jump start your efforts then buy some ovulation predictor tests that way you can be definite of your ovulation and have a better chance of conceiving. Also, try to take supplements like folic acid and prenatal vitamins your husband could even take selenium and b12. I hope your journey to motherhood is a quick one!!
Just relax, and BD a lot. Women will tell you all kinds of ways to track your ovulation. We just BD everyother day (best for sperm) from the time my period ends, till it starts again. That way we are sure to get it, even if it's weird cycle.
Good luck, baby dust!
PS: I had never heard this before, spit and lubes can inhibit sperm, so don't use them at lubricants.
AWW congrats on TTC. I am TTC #1 as well. So excited. I am just about to start my second month. All I can say is try to stay stress free and eat healthy and drink lots of fluids.
im TTC #1 also!!!!! but defently keep a healty diet and make sure you dont stress about it!!! just stay calm and dont think about it happeneing and you and your hubby have lots of fun!!! :) **lots of baby dust to you**So excited! Finally TTC #1! Any hints or words of advice?
Since I'm also ttc #1 but for 2+ years now....My advice is that if you want to jump start your efforts then buy some ovulation predictor tests that way you can be definite of your ovulation and have a better chance of conceiving. Also, try to take supplements like folic acid and prenatal vitamins your husband could even take selenium and b12. I hope your journey to motherhood is a quick one!!
Just relax, and BD a lot. Women will tell you all kinds of ways to track your ovulation. We just BD everyother day (best for sperm) from the time my period ends, till it starts again. That way we are sure to get it, even if it's weird cycle.
Good luck, baby dust!
PS: I had never heard this before, spit and lubes can inhibit sperm, so don't use them at lubricants.
AWW congrats on TTC. I am TTC #1 as well. So excited. I am just about to start my second month. All I can say is try to stay stress free and eat healthy and drink lots of fluids.
Today, I quit smoking. Any words of advice and encouragement?
My boyfriend was hospitalized earlier this week and it scared the hell out of me. I told him that we both need to quit smoking. He hasn't stop. Hopefully, I can quit and set an example for him. What else should I do when I ';need'; a cigarette? At what point will I know I have overcome this 10 year addiction?Today, I quit smoking. Any words of advice and encouragement?
First of all, congrats. I smoked for 9 years, quit for 4 months, started back up and finally quit for good again. The first time I ';quit'; was rough. I was mad all the time and thought about smoking every day. It took about 3 full weeks to not feel the cravings anymore. I highly suggest not drinking liquor for awhile either, because every time I drank, I'd smoke. I eventually had to use Wellbutrin which was the best thing in the world to help me quit. Just be patient, let your friends and family know that you're not purposely being a jerk (if you are), and if you wanna smoke.. DON'T. Take a walk, eat some carrots, chew gum, do anything you can. it's not easy but I know you can do it. Good luck and stay strong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Today, I quit smoking. Any words of advice and encouragement?
I quit on New Year's, simply because it was a good landmark occasion. I think the easiest way to quit is to wean yourself off. Not only do you physiologically need cigarettes right now, but you have habits and behaviors associated with smoking (smoking after certain meals, the method you light up and flick your ash, certain friends you smoke with, etc). The best method (other than pharmacological approaches) is to find a replacement. I found exotic teas I like, and now cure and blend tea. Rather than light up, I make a cup of tea. It's amazing. You will not hear one wheeze when you walk up a flight of stairs.
I don't think you ever overcome addiction, you just learn to live with it.
Good for you on your decision to quit though. Please know that this will boost your immune system and make you smell better. If your boyfriend persists in his smoking habits, it might be a good time to separate yourself from him.
My dear, smoking has no addiction. It's all in your head. I am now 65 years old. I have smoked for 30+ years and I quited 10 years ago. It was so easy. I often joked with my friends that I can testify for the cigarette companies that smoking is not addictive.
CONGRATULATIONS! =]
just try to stick with it.. it will most likely be hard. i have faith in you :)
encouragement you do deserve. i hope your b/f is okay? cigs the cause? you will know when your done as you will never crave them anymore. TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!!and reward yourself after every week of non-smoking.when you need a cigarette remember your b/f hosp event. and try walking to take your mind off smoking. remember if you slip?? start over the very next day. sometimes in most cases it takes 4-5 tries. also hospitals have cigarette group. you can call non-smokers anonymous. or nicerette has a toll free number. advantages- better lungs, heart, taste buds,good smells. i have FAITH IN YOU!! let me know if you ever need to talk. e-mail and i will give you my phone # or i can call you and be your support person. i am a nurse. this is a new beginning for you. set that example you will benefit in more ways than one. plus you will have additional money for things you want or savings. %26amp; good health to you. now a nonsmoker. REMEMBER, if you would relapse dont torture yourself it took me several trys everyone is different. maybe, your last cig WAS your last. i pray. and i will say alittle prayer for you tonight as well. thanks for listening and reading. dont forget me!! i will be their only an e-mail away.
My dad smoked for 60 plus years. When he died in 2001, my mom didn't realize how much he spent on his addiction. So, if you stay away from them, you'll have lots more money :)
First of all, CONGRATULATIONS!
Quitting smoking, or any other addictive, in my opinion is one of the hardest mental challenges!
You're halfway there!!
Try looking for patches etc. (like gum or something too) that can slowly ease you off when you feel like you ';need'; one. I'm sure you'll start to feel great as it wears off!! My uncle, a 20 year addict, finally decided to quit a few years ago and now, he says, he feels great -- more energy, more enthusiasm, and everything tastes like it has more flavour.
In my opinion, not that i've ever quit (because i never started), you'll feel it when you feel positive, full of energy when you wake up -- ready to face the world without cigarettes
Hope this helps
take up bubblegum until the cravings fully wear off
I quit several times, for almost a year each time. It seemed like I proved I could do it, so it was OK to go back. This time it has been 2 years at the end of this month, and I won't go back. The thing that keeps me from doing it is the thought of having to quit all over again, from the beginning. It almost hurts..it's so hard. I think I have replaced nicotine with caffeine, because when I get a craving I get a cup of coffee. Also, just take it one craving at a time, they pass pretty quick. Good Luck! If at first you don't succeed, try, try again!!!!
I always tell my patients that every cigarette they smoke is a ticket to the hospital. It isn't a question of if, it's a question of when.
be strong and commit to your goal to quit
Stick something else long in your mouth and suck on it,and blow.Already did and will tonight too.
Just don't buy any and don't smoke any. That is a disgusting habit. I will not even consider dating a woman who is a smoker, ewwww...
only Today??? but you deciding is good but after i didn't smoked for 26 days i started all over again
my one and only word for you is ';GOOD-JoB!! :] You should be proud for your self and keep up the work and then you just need to keep your goal up and then by the point you might not even know that you have stop smoking already!!
When you have a few drinks and do not want one, or you move to CA or NY where they do not allow smoking indoors. Just do not do it, no matter what . Make an agreement with yourself not to do it. FOrm a bad opion of it, or just look at the bags under your 64 year-old uncle's eyes (after 50 years of smokin). That shoud do it.
You asked for advice. Here it is. Look at pics of autopsy photos of Smokers' lungs.
http://www.presmark.com/htmlfile/picture鈥?/a>
It's ok to cry- You've been a victim of a multiBillion $$ marketing machine for some time now.
Good Luck- Your brain is even working against you as it feels the only solution for your withdrawal is more nicotine.
I have broken my 37 year, 1 pack a day habit, now for 2 years. I pray to God I never go back. I have quit a hundred times and hated myself each time I took that first hit again because I might as well go by a carton. I tried cold turkey, patches, self hypnosis, gum, and whatever else I could try. Its like it had control of me, I finally got the commit lozenges and that worked for me. I started at the 4 mg, then went to the 2 mg. I keep some nicotine gum around in case of emergencies. I can empathize with drug addicts to a degree, because it has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I still dream of smoking........but I'm not going back. So start out with a group of friends that will pray for you, and stick to it. Don't let it take you as long as it did for me. You can do it now and be free from the constant worry of....(wheres my cigarettes, my lighter, do I have enough cigarettes on and on) Quit Now and Live!!! Go to The Intercessors.com and post a prayer request, so people can be praying for you 24/7. You will need God's help. The very best to you.
Yeaaaaa,keep up the good work!
Come up with a list of things to do. Everything you feel like you need a cigarette, do something on the list. Also keep lots of gum and hard candy on hand so that you can pop something in your mouth when you want a cigarette. The first two weeks is the hardest, so try your best to get through it. Have a support partner you can call if the craving gets too bad, and talk through the craving. And if you accidently slip up once, don't give up, just keep going. Don't let one or two mistakes bring you all the way down again.
good for you ! it gonna be tough.
after everyday of not smoking, give yourself a reward like .................(i dont know) .............a cigarette !
You could switch to chewing tobacco.
chew on celery, and depending on how long you have been with him if he doesn't care about his health then why should you? Leave him for like a week to send a message that smoking is not ok. Drink a lot of water, and keep yourself busy, swimming and hiking. As long as you are busy then you won't crave a cigarette.
F***ing niiice! You rock. Seriously, I've heard its really hard to quit, so much respect :)
get prescription meds.
you have to really hate it , most of it is mind over matter , get some sugar free hard candies and pop one when you get the urge , find things to occupy your mind . I've been smoke free for a long time and it is hard but if you put your mind to it you can beat it , good luck
just say I DONT NEED TO FU,KING DO IT KUZ ITS GONNA KILL ME...u know it will.........so please.....dont smoke u can do it........U CAN.....thank you
Its tough but you can do it. Do not have even one. 2 months and you will think less and less about it
How bad do you want it? (Isn't that the real question?)
I quit smoking about 20 years ago after smoking for about 12 years (1-1/2 packs per day)I tried everything, patches, gum, nicotine filters you name it and I still smoked, it finally happened when I realised that I had to really want to give up deep down or it wasnt gonna happen, end of story. so I just made up my mind and stopped period, cold turkey, no aids or anything. There is an old saying ';when the going gets tough................you know the rest! Its time to decide whether you are gonna spend the rest of your life as a victorious winner or a cowering cringing wimp.Only you know the answer to that.rosacea cream
First of all, congrats. I smoked for 9 years, quit for 4 months, started back up and finally quit for good again. The first time I ';quit'; was rough. I was mad all the time and thought about smoking every day. It took about 3 full weeks to not feel the cravings anymore. I highly suggest not drinking liquor for awhile either, because every time I drank, I'd smoke. I eventually had to use Wellbutrin which was the best thing in the world to help me quit. Just be patient, let your friends and family know that you're not purposely being a jerk (if you are), and if you wanna smoke.. DON'T. Take a walk, eat some carrots, chew gum, do anything you can. it's not easy but I know you can do it. Good luck and stay strong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Today, I quit smoking. Any words of advice and encouragement?
I quit on New Year's, simply because it was a good landmark occasion. I think the easiest way to quit is to wean yourself off. Not only do you physiologically need cigarettes right now, but you have habits and behaviors associated with smoking (smoking after certain meals, the method you light up and flick your ash, certain friends you smoke with, etc). The best method (other than pharmacological approaches) is to find a replacement. I found exotic teas I like, and now cure and blend tea. Rather than light up, I make a cup of tea. It's amazing. You will not hear one wheeze when you walk up a flight of stairs.
I don't think you ever overcome addiction, you just learn to live with it.
Good for you on your decision to quit though. Please know that this will boost your immune system and make you smell better. If your boyfriend persists in his smoking habits, it might be a good time to separate yourself from him.
My dear, smoking has no addiction. It's all in your head. I am now 65 years old. I have smoked for 30+ years and I quited 10 years ago. It was so easy. I often joked with my friends that I can testify for the cigarette companies that smoking is not addictive.
CONGRATULATIONS! =]
just try to stick with it.. it will most likely be hard. i have faith in you :)
encouragement you do deserve. i hope your b/f is okay? cigs the cause? you will know when your done as you will never crave them anymore. TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!!and reward yourself after every week of non-smoking.when you need a cigarette remember your b/f hosp event. and try walking to take your mind off smoking. remember if you slip?? start over the very next day. sometimes in most cases it takes 4-5 tries. also hospitals have cigarette group. you can call non-smokers anonymous. or nicerette has a toll free number. advantages- better lungs, heart, taste buds,good smells. i have FAITH IN YOU!! let me know if you ever need to talk. e-mail and i will give you my phone # or i can call you and be your support person. i am a nurse. this is a new beginning for you. set that example you will benefit in more ways than one. plus you will have additional money for things you want or savings. %26amp; good health to you. now a nonsmoker. REMEMBER, if you would relapse dont torture yourself it took me several trys everyone is different. maybe, your last cig WAS your last. i pray. and i will say alittle prayer for you tonight as well. thanks for listening and reading. dont forget me!! i will be their only an e-mail away.
My dad smoked for 60 plus years. When he died in 2001, my mom didn't realize how much he spent on his addiction. So, if you stay away from them, you'll have lots more money :)
First of all, CONGRATULATIONS!
Quitting smoking, or any other addictive, in my opinion is one of the hardest mental challenges!
You're halfway there!!
Try looking for patches etc. (like gum or something too) that can slowly ease you off when you feel like you ';need'; one. I'm sure you'll start to feel great as it wears off!! My uncle, a 20 year addict, finally decided to quit a few years ago and now, he says, he feels great -- more energy, more enthusiasm, and everything tastes like it has more flavour.
In my opinion, not that i've ever quit (because i never started), you'll feel it when you feel positive, full of energy when you wake up -- ready to face the world without cigarettes
Hope this helps
take up bubblegum until the cravings fully wear off
I quit several times, for almost a year each time. It seemed like I proved I could do it, so it was OK to go back. This time it has been 2 years at the end of this month, and I won't go back. The thing that keeps me from doing it is the thought of having to quit all over again, from the beginning. It almost hurts..it's so hard. I think I have replaced nicotine with caffeine, because when I get a craving I get a cup of coffee. Also, just take it one craving at a time, they pass pretty quick. Good Luck! If at first you don't succeed, try, try again!!!!
I always tell my patients that every cigarette they smoke is a ticket to the hospital. It isn't a question of if, it's a question of when.
be strong and commit to your goal to quit
Stick something else long in your mouth and suck on it,and blow.Already did and will tonight too.
Just don't buy any and don't smoke any. That is a disgusting habit. I will not even consider dating a woman who is a smoker, ewwww...
only Today??? but you deciding is good but after i didn't smoked for 26 days i started all over again
my one and only word for you is ';GOOD-JoB!! :] You should be proud for your self and keep up the work and then you just need to keep your goal up and then by the point you might not even know that you have stop smoking already!!
When you have a few drinks and do not want one, or you move to CA or NY where they do not allow smoking indoors. Just do not do it, no matter what . Make an agreement with yourself not to do it. FOrm a bad opion of it, or just look at the bags under your 64 year-old uncle's eyes (after 50 years of smokin). That shoud do it.
You asked for advice. Here it is. Look at pics of autopsy photos of Smokers' lungs.
http://www.presmark.com/htmlfile/picture鈥?/a>
It's ok to cry- You've been a victim of a multiBillion $$ marketing machine for some time now.
Good Luck- Your brain is even working against you as it feels the only solution for your withdrawal is more nicotine.
I have broken my 37 year, 1 pack a day habit, now for 2 years. I pray to God I never go back. I have quit a hundred times and hated myself each time I took that first hit again because I might as well go by a carton. I tried cold turkey, patches, self hypnosis, gum, and whatever else I could try. Its like it had control of me, I finally got the commit lozenges and that worked for me. I started at the 4 mg, then went to the 2 mg. I keep some nicotine gum around in case of emergencies. I can empathize with drug addicts to a degree, because it has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I still dream of smoking........but I'm not going back. So start out with a group of friends that will pray for you, and stick to it. Don't let it take you as long as it did for me. You can do it now and be free from the constant worry of....(wheres my cigarettes, my lighter, do I have enough cigarettes on and on) Quit Now and Live!!! Go to The Intercessors.com and post a prayer request, so people can be praying for you 24/7. You will need God's help. The very best to you.
Yeaaaaa,keep up the good work!
Come up with a list of things to do. Everything you feel like you need a cigarette, do something on the list. Also keep lots of gum and hard candy on hand so that you can pop something in your mouth when you want a cigarette. The first two weeks is the hardest, so try your best to get through it. Have a support partner you can call if the craving gets too bad, and talk through the craving. And if you accidently slip up once, don't give up, just keep going. Don't let one or two mistakes bring you all the way down again.
good for you ! it gonna be tough.
after everyday of not smoking, give yourself a reward like .................(i dont know) .............a cigarette !
You could switch to chewing tobacco.
chew on celery, and depending on how long you have been with him if he doesn't care about his health then why should you? Leave him for like a week to send a message that smoking is not ok. Drink a lot of water, and keep yourself busy, swimming and hiking. As long as you are busy then you won't crave a cigarette.
F***ing niiice! You rock. Seriously, I've heard its really hard to quit, so much respect :)
get prescription meds.
you have to really hate it , most of it is mind over matter , get some sugar free hard candies and pop one when you get the urge , find things to occupy your mind . I've been smoke free for a long time and it is hard but if you put your mind to it you can beat it , good luck
just say I DONT NEED TO FU,KING DO IT KUZ ITS GONNA KILL ME...u know it will.........so please.....dont smoke u can do it........U CAN.....thank you
Its tough but you can do it. Do not have even one. 2 months and you will think less and less about it
How bad do you want it? (Isn't that the real question?)
I quit smoking about 20 years ago after smoking for about 12 years (1-1/2 packs per day)I tried everything, patches, gum, nicotine filters you name it and I still smoked, it finally happened when I realised that I had to really want to give up deep down or it wasnt gonna happen, end of story. so I just made up my mind and stopped period, cold turkey, no aids or anything. There is an old saying ';when the going gets tough................you know the rest! Its time to decide whether you are gonna spend the rest of your life as a victorious winner or a cowering cringing wimp.Only you know the answer to that.
Words of advice?
friend of mine is preg.
had intercourse on new years eve. then not again till the end of january beginning feb for when she got back in the relationship she was in they wante dto try for a baby.
going by early ultrasounds, and given a due date of oct 26 when could of intercource or when could she have concieved?
shes lookin at me for advice and im lost on words
thanks in advanceWords of advice?
She would have gotten pregnancy in January. you are pregnant for 40 weeks so count back. also the ultra sound can be off by a few weeks, so don't freak out and just count the weeks. when I got pregnant they told me I conceived April 1st or around there I know I did not because I was out of town at my mothers then, I returned home and my husband and I did the deed on the 13th and then so on.
had intercourse on new years eve. then not again till the end of january beginning feb for when she got back in the relationship she was in they wante dto try for a baby.
going by early ultrasounds, and given a due date of oct 26 when could of intercource or when could she have concieved?
shes lookin at me for advice and im lost on words
thanks in advanceWords of advice?
She would have gotten pregnancy in January. you are pregnant for 40 weeks so count back. also the ultra sound can be off by a few weeks, so don't freak out and just count the weeks. when I got pregnant they told me I conceived April 1st or around there I know I did not because I was out of town at my mothers then, I returned home and my husband and I did the deed on the 13th and then so on.
Any wise words of advice.an emoitonal 3some.?
a lil background ,been with my man for 9 yrs and we have a beautiful 4yr old, He cheated on and off for the 1st 5yrs. I forgave him for the last 3 I thought he was faithful, turns out he wasn't for A year,I guess thats why we wasn't having sex ,I thought it was his drinking problem. So any way I met someone was with him for a year.I guess I needed the attention, but I'm now pregnant and it his, Even my man knew that it wasn't his ,but only problem he forgave me and adopted the baby in his heart. I love my man and I love the other guy too sounds sleazy but its true. only the other guy is not really relationship material to me, but he want to be together and be apart of this baby's life. My man thinks our relationship won't survive if he's comes around. I am not sure either I can't detach myself from him, I want to work things out with my man ,he planning our wedding and everything and he's excited about the baby ,even through its not his. What do I do now ,I got myself in deep ****.Any wise words of advice.an emoitonal 3some.?
I'l say you got yourself in some deep ****. You need to sort out your feelings, and decide who you love more. I think if you really loved your 1st man, then you wouldn't have gone out and slept with someone for a year. You need to sort out your ****Any wise words of advice.an emoitonal 3some.?
Why you're having baby for the other guy? Why You need the attention by having other man's baby? I don't get it!! I feel bad for the unborn baby, because your foolish and self-fish, and you most to bring a new life into your messed up life to fullfill your attention.
I'l say you got yourself in some deep ****. You need to sort out your feelings, and decide who you love more. I think if you really loved your 1st man, then you wouldn't have gone out and slept with someone for a year. You need to sort out your ****Any wise words of advice.an emoitonal 3some.?
Why you're having baby for the other guy? Why You need the attention by having other man's baby? I don't get it!! I feel bad for the unborn baby, because your foolish and self-fish, and you most to bring a new life into your messed up life to fullfill your attention.
Does anyone have any words of advice?
Our dog passed away today and my 8 yr old son is dealing with it ok, but when he is alone I hear him crying. We are all so upset, but I am trying not to cry in front of him because then he gets upset . I keep telling him that our dog is ok now (he was sick for a while) but maybe someone can help me, maybe someone has experienced this too. so any words of advice? thank youDoes anyone have any words of advice?
Oh gosh I am so sorry. It is a rough time I know we have lost many dogs in our lifetime and it never gets any easier. It is OK to let your son see that you are sad too. All I can tell you is to let him talk about it all he wants and then maybe you can bring in some funny stories about the things the dog did when the dog was healthy. Laughing about some of the stories will help. By telling these stories your son will be able to see that the dog hadn't felt good for quite a while. Only time will really make things better. Again I am so sorry. Good luckDoes anyone have any words of advice?
Thanks-Glad things are going a little better, but I know it will take time.
My cat died and my son was very upset, here's a poem that helped him:
The Rainbow Bridge
There is a bridge connecting Heaven %26amp; Earth.
It is called the Rainbow Bridge because of its colors.
Just this side of the Rainbow Bridge there is a land of
meadows, hills and valleys with lush green grass.
When a beloved pet dies, the pet goes to this place.
There is always food and water and warm spring weather.
The old and frail animals are young again. Those who
are maimed are made whole. They play together all day.
There is only one thing missing: They are not with
their special person who loved them on Earth.
Each day they run and play until the day comes
when one suddenly stops playing and looks up!
The nose twitches! The ears are up! The eyes are staring!
And this one suddenly runs from the group.
You have been seen, and when you and your special friend meet,
you take him or her in your arms and embrace.
Your face is kissed again and again, and you look once
more into the eyes of your trusting friend.
Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together,
never again to be separated
Bring him to get another dog
As with any death, grieving is important. At that age it's always good to hold a small service where he can get some closure and say farewell. Don't be afraid to show your grief in front of him either, it won't do any harm.
Maybe you don't know that there are many books for children on this subject in the library. Stories he will be able to relate to. When we lost out dog when my four kids were still home, everyone was so unhappy, including me, that we went out and bought a puppy. No one can resist a puppy. Just stress that the puppy is not taking the old dogs place.
he is hurting let him express his grief time will heal his wounds
The loss of a beloved pet hurts, but like any other loss, it gets better with time. After a sufficient amount of time has passed, you may want to consider getting another dog. While your son will never forget the dog you speak of, another dog in due time will help to take the sting out.
We have been through this too.... my sympathies to you....
I found that it was best to just let it out-- cry with your child %26amp; let him know that you hurt too. It lets him see that his feelings are valid %26amp; nothing to be ashamed of. And he knows that you are human too.
Aw, I am sorry. How sad for your son. I don't have any advice, just wanted to convey condolences.
Sounds like you took care of him till the end. That's hard work.
He had a full good life with people who cared about him. He was lucky
Yes. Don't be afraid to cry with him nad explain that crying n this case is a good thing, becuase it helps with feeling better over the loss of your beloved doggie.
I would say do NOT run out and get a new dog, leave some time to grieve, but do open up the option for your son. Tell him when he's ready for a new dog, then you can go get one.
In the meantime, help him talk about the good things he remembers with the dog, fun things they did together.
Actually having the dog be ill before he died is actually better for the process of grieving for your son, because he knew that it was something that was eventual and expected. Makes it easier than a sudden death.
Let him cry today. let him cry when he needs to for a little while - but if it doesn't seem to lighten up within a week or so, then you may consider talking to his doctor about it.
The first death anyone deals with - whether a pet or a human being - is the hardest.
Are you considering getting a replacement dog? That is a tremendous boost there. When I had to put our dog down about 12 years ago, we were all devastated. Mostly me, (the dad.) I swore I would never get a different breed than the one I had to put down. (Australian cattle dog.) I thought she was the best dog in the world. Well, the wife and kids came across the mutt that I have now, and I fell in love with her, and her me. We named her Chelsea, and she is without a doubt the BEST and smartest dog in the world. She has shocked me so many times with things she has done. My wife and I divorced about 6 years ago, I got to keep Chelsea, and they got the yellow lab. Chelsea has been the best therapy and companion I could ask for. She can sense a change in my voice when I'm on the phone, and will come over to me and rest her head on my lap just to comfort me. Tell your son that you can go out and find a replacement for your dog, and I guarantee he will be back to normal after he gets that first puppy lick from the new dog. (Sorry, I didn't mean this to be so long.) Just tell him to hang in there, and things will look up. I wish you the best of luck.
Oh gosh I am so sorry. It is a rough time I know we have lost many dogs in our lifetime and it never gets any easier. It is OK to let your son see that you are sad too. All I can tell you is to let him talk about it all he wants and then maybe you can bring in some funny stories about the things the dog did when the dog was healthy. Laughing about some of the stories will help. By telling these stories your son will be able to see that the dog hadn't felt good for quite a while. Only time will really make things better. Again I am so sorry. Good luckDoes anyone have any words of advice?
Thanks-Glad things are going a little better, but I know it will take time.
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My cat died and my son was very upset, here's a poem that helped him:
The Rainbow Bridge
There is a bridge connecting Heaven %26amp; Earth.
It is called the Rainbow Bridge because of its colors.
Just this side of the Rainbow Bridge there is a land of
meadows, hills and valleys with lush green grass.
When a beloved pet dies, the pet goes to this place.
There is always food and water and warm spring weather.
The old and frail animals are young again. Those who
are maimed are made whole. They play together all day.
There is only one thing missing: They are not with
their special person who loved them on Earth.
Each day they run and play until the day comes
when one suddenly stops playing and looks up!
The nose twitches! The ears are up! The eyes are staring!
And this one suddenly runs from the group.
You have been seen, and when you and your special friend meet,
you take him or her in your arms and embrace.
Your face is kissed again and again, and you look once
more into the eyes of your trusting friend.
Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together,
never again to be separated
Bring him to get another dog
As with any death, grieving is important. At that age it's always good to hold a small service where he can get some closure and say farewell. Don't be afraid to show your grief in front of him either, it won't do any harm.
Maybe you don't know that there are many books for children on this subject in the library. Stories he will be able to relate to. When we lost out dog when my four kids were still home, everyone was so unhappy, including me, that we went out and bought a puppy. No one can resist a puppy. Just stress that the puppy is not taking the old dogs place.
he is hurting let him express his grief time will heal his wounds
The loss of a beloved pet hurts, but like any other loss, it gets better with time. After a sufficient amount of time has passed, you may want to consider getting another dog. While your son will never forget the dog you speak of, another dog in due time will help to take the sting out.
We have been through this too.... my sympathies to you....
I found that it was best to just let it out-- cry with your child %26amp; let him know that you hurt too. It lets him see that his feelings are valid %26amp; nothing to be ashamed of. And he knows that you are human too.
Aw, I am sorry. How sad for your son. I don't have any advice, just wanted to convey condolences.
Sounds like you took care of him till the end. That's hard work.
He had a full good life with people who cared about him. He was lucky
Yes. Don't be afraid to cry with him nad explain that crying n this case is a good thing, becuase it helps with feeling better over the loss of your beloved doggie.
I would say do NOT run out and get a new dog, leave some time to grieve, but do open up the option for your son. Tell him when he's ready for a new dog, then you can go get one.
In the meantime, help him talk about the good things he remembers with the dog, fun things they did together.
Actually having the dog be ill before he died is actually better for the process of grieving for your son, because he knew that it was something that was eventual and expected. Makes it easier than a sudden death.
Let him cry today. let him cry when he needs to for a little while - but if it doesn't seem to lighten up within a week or so, then you may consider talking to his doctor about it.
The first death anyone deals with - whether a pet or a human being - is the hardest.
Are you considering getting a replacement dog? That is a tremendous boost there. When I had to put our dog down about 12 years ago, we were all devastated. Mostly me, (the dad.) I swore I would never get a different breed than the one I had to put down. (Australian cattle dog.) I thought she was the best dog in the world. Well, the wife and kids came across the mutt that I have now, and I fell in love with her, and her me. We named her Chelsea, and she is without a doubt the BEST and smartest dog in the world. She has shocked me so many times with things she has done. My wife and I divorced about 6 years ago, I got to keep Chelsea, and they got the yellow lab. Chelsea has been the best therapy and companion I could ask for. She can sense a change in my voice when I'm on the phone, and will come over to me and rest her head on my lap just to comfort me. Tell your son that you can go out and find a replacement for your dog, and I guarantee he will be back to normal after he gets that first puppy lick from the new dog. (Sorry, I didn't mean this to be so long.) Just tell him to hang in there, and things will look up. I wish you the best of luck.
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